Magical Helper, Magical Friend
Tiny Little Man Seeks Only to Help
February 11, 2022
Tiny Cottage, Deep in the Woods — Mr. Rumpelstiltskin, the famed “tiny little man” of classic literature, strongly denies all accusations regarding “child theft,” “baby-napping,” and other such charges. Mr. Rumpelstiltskin loves children, deeply and truly.
Mr. Rumpelstiltskin demands that his name be cleared, and that the Kingdom’s official record be changed to reflect the truth.
His interactions with the Miller’s Daughter, now the Queen, during a period of great distress for the young woman, was only to save her life in the face of unrelenting danger. The Miller’s Daughter was sent to the castle by her father under false pretenses, and the failure to produce the promised gold would have ended her life. In exchange for his help, Mr. Rumpelstiltskin naturally accepted payment; as everyone knows, it is never wise for either party to carry forward with a fairy tale debt.
When the Miller’s Daughter was at the peak of danger yet had nothing else with which to make an exchange, Mr. Rumpelstiltskin took pity on her and allowed her to promise that he’d have access to her firstborn baby; naturally, there are no babies more delightful nor more precious than the first prince or princess born to the current reigning Queen and King.
Indeed, the Royal Baby has issued a statement, reiterating her love for Rumpelstiltskin and demanding that she be allowed to visit his tiny cottage deep in the woods, saying,
I would love nothing more than to spend time with my dear friend, Rumpelstiltskin, who took the time to prepare cakes just for my visit. I have been deeply affected by his departure.
Royal Baby
Mr. Rumpelstiltskin currently stars in a number of fairy tales, both ancient and modern. Since falling through the earth, he has returned to his tiny cottage in the woods, where he continues to bake cakes, brew beer, and dance around a tiny fire.
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I’m looking forward to hearing from you soon!
Sincerely, Barb Gugelives
Owner, GUGELIVES Pup & Kit Fashion, Inc.
Barbara Shaddix 